I declare Thanksgiving to be in September (And an ode to struggle).

One might have gathered from previous entries that I am a casual fan of the month of November. Ok, I hate it more than I hate the arrogance of the god Saturn and the pimp rings he surrounds his planet with. I’m sure such resources could be put to more beneficial use than a gaudy statement of ones galactic social standing and personal wealth. Like a cure for cancer. Actually the cure for cancer is the sweat of the Old Spice man, the man of men, who I recently called upon to make me a voicemail message for my cellular device:

Jealous? I would be. It is the most professional thing on Gaia’s large arse. “Gaia” means “earth” and is a term lovingly used by eco-fascists and green shirts everywhere that believe mankind is a cancer. I haven’t seen any of them volunteering to off themselves in groups of 20k, though. How curious! Sometimes I wonder if my sarcasm and political references get annoying to others. Hm.

Back to the original subject of Thanksgiving: aside from the fact that the general public only acknowledges the whitewashed version of it, I just do not care for it. The family aspect of it is grand, but I don’t care for any of the food aside from stuffing. Plus, look outside, I cannot zee (yes, zee) a single leaf on a tree. Nature is hibernating. Not my cup of tea. I prefer water. Does anybody go out for water? Beers? Yes. Water? They should try it. Maybe I will try it. “Hey, want to head out after work for some waters?” That sounds cool, right? What if it’s artisan water? Actually I should make my own “man water”. Something us manly men can gather around and grunt about while jostling each other and giving each other a hard time like on “Shoving Buddies”, the made-up sitcom, as referenced on Family Guy, haha!

Earlier I had been reflecting on the past few years, in light of Thanksgiving being a holiday in which we all give thanks for something (usually). There is a great deal that I am thankful for to the point of making sentimental watercolor paintings of it all. However the last few years have also been riddled with trying circumstances. Anyway, I hope everyone has a lovely & memorable Thanksgiving with those who mean something to you!

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